Jeff Goins wrote a brilliant piece on the cost of compassion. I invite you to join the conversation. http://goinswriter.com/cost-of-compassion/
For three years I had a position at church where I served
people on a weekly, sometimes daily, basis that had needs. It was rewarding and
heart-wrenching. I had days when I cried and was down on my knees, and days I
rejoiced for the progress they made. Then two years into this service came a
day when my mother’s cancer, my step-father’s cancer, my step-mother’s death
and my oldest son leaving for a two year mission all came crashing in at once
and I had to reach out to those I had been helping and supporting for their strength.
Often the one serving is the one who in the end is raised up. I spent another
year in this position. Now I’m serving the people in my church (and by extension
the larger community) in another capacity. My mother and step-father are
better. My son is thriving on his mission in Brazil and will be home in
February.
Most often when people think about extending compassion they
think of big things- serving weekly in a shelter or going to a foreign country
and working with people in dire straits, but for most people this is not
possible. What is possible is extending compassion on a daily basis and in seemingly
small ways. Taking a few moments to visit with an elderly neighbor, driving the
speed limit and being courteous to the others on the road, turning off the
music, or other distraction, and talking with, not to, your child, bringing a
meal to a friend- just because. You never know the ripple effect these ‘small’
acts of compassion can have in a life, to a family, to a community.
I would encourage you though to make the conscience choice
to structure your life and set the goal to serve deeper and harder. It may mean
working less, or giving up a favorite hobby, or not having a vacation, or
forgoing a conference, or restructuring retirement so you have the time and
money to be in the difficult places.
Please- share your thoughts and experiences with compassion. Compassion you've been able to extend or compassion extended to you.
Thanks for the response, Nicole. I've received a lot of compassion in my life -- from God, my wife, and friends. I think we are able to love, because we've first been loved. For some this may be easier than others, but we all need to find ways in which we've been recipients of mercy and kindness. This is the only place from which true compassion comes -- love. And love endures all things, even pain.
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