08 June 2011

Selfishness-Selflessness

I yesterday had a conversation with someone who’s been in a12 step program for a year. He said, “For many years I thought I was a generous and caring person. Now I understand most of what I did was motivated from selfishness.”
I have been feeling angry lately about the selfish choices people make (drugs, alcohol abuse, child neglect, affairs, theft, porn, etc.). I think my parents generation (they are in their late 60’s) was fed a bunch of garbage with books like “I’m Okay, You’re Okay” and philosophies of, “if it feels good do it” or “as long as you aren’t hurting anyone, go ahead” not thinking that a person can be hurt in more than just in a physical way. I think of the children of the 70’s (the first generation to experience wide spread divorce, large numbers in day care, and the idea of quality time over quantity time) who became the latchkey kids of the 80’s (the “me generation”) who now have kids reaching adulthood who don’t know how to work, don’t know how to connect, don’t know how to have a family meal together.  

It’s discouraging. 

So I started to look for the positive.

A friend- lives in southern California in a very small house with five children. Husband works a blue collar job. They home school because they live in the L.A. school district. Selflessness.

My sister- works early morning while hubby home with kiddo. Hubby works night when Sis is home with kiddo. Kiddo gets lots of one-on-one from mom and dad. Never been to daycare. Selflessness

Neighbors- raises a big garden and chickens.  They are always giving away fresh produce and eggs to those with less. Selflessness

These are all people who broke with the examples of their childhood.

             What are some examples of selflessness you see in your sphere of influence?